1.18 - Farnsby & B

Episode Number: Season 1, Episode 18
Episode Title: Farnsby & B
Air Date: April 21, 2022
Written By: Joe Port, Joe Wiseman
Directed By: Cortney Carrillo
Regular Cast: Rose McIver, Utkarsh Ambudkar, Brandon Scott Jones, Brandon Scott Jones, Danielle Pinnock, Asher Grodman, Román Zaragoza, Sheila Carrasco, Rebecca Wisocky, Devan Chandler Long
Guest Cast: Tristan D. Lalla, Kathryn Greenwood, Mark Linn-Baker, John Hartman, Betsy Sodaro, Vartan, Lindsey Broad, Stuart Fink, Nigel Downer, Arthur Holden, Christian Daoust, Larry Day, Jayne Heitmeyer
Episode Images: Episode Stills | Screen Captures

 

Episode Summary

The Ghosts come down the stairs and see Flower at the bottom. They tell her that Samantha has just shown them the musical Hamilton. Pete calls it a triumph, Sasappis, an inspiration, Hetty, a pinnacle of human achievement. Isaac says “it was…fine” and looks annoyed.

The Farnsbys stop by to drop off lemon bars and to congratulate Sam and Jay on their upcoming opening of the B&B. Henry asks Jay if they still intend to go through with the opening and, when Jay says yes, Henry offers to buy the Woodstone Mansion. When Jay refuses the offer, Henry assures him that they have not heard the last of the Farnsbys’.

Mark, their contractor, tells Sam how good Jay is at pickleball. Sam is surprised because she didn’t realize Jay had ever played that game. Mark also has some more important news-Sam and Jay have termites in the basement!

Sam says that ”it’s just one problem after another with the house” and Jay agrees saying that it’s like they are cursed. Thor tells the other Ghosts that Jay is right, he cursed them after scaring them out of the house failed.

Meanwhile, Isaac tells Hetty that he’s afraid that he has ruined his chances with Nigel and that he fears Nigel is avoiding him. Hetty tells Isaac not to give up out of fear and starts quoting from the musical Hamilton. Isaac asks Hetty if she is quoting Hamilton from the musical? Hetty says she says she can’t help it, it’s inspirational. Isaac tells her to stop.

Jay tells Sam that their first guests just canceled. They found “another B&B that is nearby, much nicer, cheaper and has a pickleball court.” It’s The Farnsbys! Since Jayrefused their buyout offer,The Farnsbys opened a rival B&B to drive them out of business. They are calling it The Farnsbys & B. Pete finds the name “pretty darn clever.

Sam and Jay head to The Farnsbys house to confront them. Henry tells them that they are loving this B&B life but it’s obvious that he’s annoyed with it. Sam sees that The Farnsbys also have a ghost: a 1950’s housewife.

Encouraged by his talk with Hetty, Isaac goes to find Nigel but he finds Jenkins instead. Jenkins tells Isaac that Nigel is no longer with us, he has been “sucked off”. The news is devastating to Isaac.

Meanwhile, Jay received another guest cancellation so Thorfinn tells Sam that he had put a Norse curse on them to stop them from opening the B&B. When Sasappis says that he doesn’t think that Thor’s curses actually work, the chandelier falls from the ceiling and crashes to the floor.

Sam asks Thor how to break the curse, and Thor says it’s very difficult. It would involve traveling to distant lands to find the rare ingredients needed. He tells her they need… 1 pound sugar and… the very rare cinnamon. Sam says that she thinks they will be alright, so they all gather to break the curse. Alberta asks if this would affect anything in the past. She’s concerned that since Sam fell down the stairs because of the curse that now, with the spell reversed,

Sam might be unable to see the Ghosts. One by one the Ghosts tell Sam what she means to them, causing Sam to realize that she can’t take the risk.

They all realize how much Sam has enriched their afterlife. Sam and Jay know that the Ghosts have enriched their lives, too, so they will have to live with the curse.

Sam decides that to solve the problem with The Farnsbys they should challenge Henry and Margaret to a game of pickleball. However, The Farnsbys are pickleball mixed double champions, so they jump at the chance. If Sam and Jay win, the Farnsbys’ would close their B&B. But, if the Farnsbys’ win, Sam and Jay will close their B&B, sell the house, and move away.

During the game, Sam discovers that Jay never actually played pickleball in real life, just a simulator game with Mark. The match is neck and neck when suddenly, Henry yells in pain that his back went out. The Farnsbys are forced to forfeit.

Sam tells the ghosts that the guests are on their way since Farnsby & B closed and “they have no other option.Pete muses that it is a shame to waste such a great name for a bed and breakfast as Farnsby & B.

Nigel comes rushing in to see Isaac and accuses him of carrying on with his “bearded floozy”, his Viking lover. Isaac thought that Nigel had been “sucked off” and is thoroughly confused at all of this. Isaac and Nigel realize that Jenkins, who had a brief tryst with Nigel 150 years ago, is jealous and lied to them both. At first, Isaac tries to play dumb about why Jenkins would care to keep two “buddies” apart. So Nigel, disappointed, turns to leave. But with the encouragement from Hetty, Isaac tells Nigel to wait. He says “I like you,Nigel asks “you like me?” and Isaac says “please don’t make me say it again”. Nigel says “well, I like you too Isaac”. Everyone is moved. Hetty says she knew about It already but is sure the rest of the Ghosts were surprised that Nigel and Isaac liked each other. The Ghosts all pretend that this is a shock.

The doorbell rings— it’s the first Woodstone guests! Sam says that the curse was to prevent them from opening the B&B so now that it’s open, they are safe. Sam and Jay open the door and welcome their first guests. But suddenly, the floor gives out causing Sam and Jay to fall through the floor into the basement, leaving us to wonder if they are still cursed.

Episode Quotes

  • “Oh, Samantha just showed us the musical Hamilton.” – Hetty
  • “We just don’t want to deal with the headache of living next door to a B and B. I mean, the traffic, the noise. The middle class trudging past in their Volvos.” – The Farnsbys 
  • “When they first move in here, we tried haunting them out, and haunting fail, so to prevent the B and B from opening, I place Norse curse on them.” – Thorfinn
  • “We’re stuck in an endless purgatory. We saw a guy go down on us a couple weeks ago. And curses is where you draw the line?” – Alberta
  • “Curse cannot be erased. Plus, if we tell Sam, she might take TV away.” – Thorfinn
  • “Hello. Oh, okay, I get it. You’re too good to talk to a cholera ghost. Well, la dee dah.” – Nancy
  • “Ever since our awkward conversation where he tried to take things in a more romantic direction, and I…” – Isaac
  • “You’re letting fear lead you. You need to go for what you want. You only have one afterlife. Do not sacrifice your shot.” – Hetty
  • “Please tell me you’re not quoting that musical Hamilton. Incorrectly, I might add.” – Isaac
  • “You’re not gonna believe this, but Josh and Leeanne just canceled. They found another B and B that is nearby, that is much nicer and cheaper and has a pickleball court. They’re calling it The Farnsby & B..” – Jay
  • “Okay, I’m gonna jump on the skeptic side here. I don’t think Thor’s curses work.” – Sasappis
  • “There is one way. But it involves boiling ingredients in cauldron. And ingredients impossible to come by. Requires sailing to distant lands to procure.” – Thorfinn
  • “Uh, hold up… is this gonna reverse the bad things that happened as a result of the curse? Or is just gonna stop more bad things from happening in the future?” – Alberta
  • “The ghosts are saying this could result in me not being able to see them.” – Sam
  • “W-wait. Um… I-I recently learned that you should say things to people before it’s too late. So even if this isn’t goodbye, I think I speak for us all when I say, Sam, you have changed our afterlives for the better. And we are forever grateful.” – Isaac
  • “Wait! Just in case, I, too, just want to say, that it has been a true honor knowing you. You arrived here a stranger with harlot hair, but you have won my heart. And become… like a daughter… with harlot hair.” – Hetty
  • “Sam… you can be a part of my troop any day. Also, please tell Jay I love him and that Mark sucks and he shouldn’t be friends with him anymore.” – Pete
  • “Hey, Sam, thank you for being a true friend. I’ll be here, watching your life. And when you die, God willing, you’ll become a ghost. And I don’t even care how old you get first. I know you’ll keep it tight.” – Trevor
  • “Sam, you’re the best thing that’s happened to me since shrooms. Which did lead to my death. But which then led to you. Thanks, shrooms.” – Flower
  • “One game of pickleball for all the marbles. You win and we sell you our place and leave town.” – Sam
  • “It turns out Jay hasn’t actually been playing pickleball. He’s been playing a pickleball video game.” – Sam
  • “It’s basically the same thing. It’s a simulator. It’s the same reason I can land a 747.” – Jay
  • “You wish I got sucked off. So you and your bearded floozy could continue galivanting without my knowledge!” – Nigel
  • “Nigel, wait. I like you.” – Isaac
  • “Well… I like you too, Isaac.” – Nigel
  • “Welcome to Woodstone B and B.” – Sam & Jay