1.08 - D&D

Episode Number: Season 1, Episode 8
Episode Title: D&D
Air Date: November 18, 2021
Written By: John Blickstead and Trey Kollmer
Directed By: Nick Wong
Regular Cast: Rose McIver, Utkarsh Ambudkar, Brandon Scott Jones, Brandon Scott Jones, Danielle Pinnock, Asher Grodman, Román Zaragoza, Sheila Carrasco, Rebecca Wisocky, Devan Chandler Long
Guest Cast: John Hartman, Julius Cho, Chad Andrews, Christian Daoust, Ryan Bommarito
Episode Images: Episode Stills | Screen Captures


Episode Summary

The year is 1777 and Captain Isaac Higgentoot is standing behind a makeshift table with his hands behind his back talking with his troop. Because they are running low on fresh water, Isaac is attempting to dissuade them from using so much water. When Collins, a member of his troop, tells him about water preventing dysentery, Isaac scoffs and asks him, “I’m sorry Collins – are a physician or a barber now?Collins lowers his head in embarrassment and other members of the troop begin to laugh. Isaac then pulls a cloth off the table to show off his newest invention, a musket with an attached spyglass, that he has named the “Eyesac”, (instead of Isaac). He then explains that the musket allows for “accurate targeting of up to 50 yards”. As his men begin to clap, Isaac picks up the musket and looks into the spyglass at Lieutenant Colonel Nigel Chessum, a British officer. Isaac tells his men that it would be unethical to strike an unarmed person while admiring Nigel, calling him a “striking fellow”. As he continues complimenting Nigel, Isaac’s soldiers began to look at each other in confusion. Sensing this, Isaac places the gun back on the table and tells his troop that there is a lot of war to do and remember, “do not shoot them until you see the green of his eyes”, unintentionally talking about the British officer.

Present day – Jay is online playing Dungeons and Dragons with some of his friends in New York. Watching as he plays, Alberta tells Pete and Sasappis that the game seems stressful. Pete then tells her that the game is not about relaxing; it’s about adventure. As the three ghosts talk among themselves, Jay becomes upset because the internet keeps going out while he and his friends are attempting to play. When it comes back on, Jay apologizes and tells his friends they should understand because they live in Queens, which is practically the country. His friends, annoyed that Jay’s internet keeps going out, explain to him that they moved downtown by their new friends, Brett and Shayla. As his friends are telling him this, Jay’s internet once again goes out. When it come back on, his friends are not aware of this, and Jay hears them talking about getting rid of his character on Dungeon and Dragons and inviting Brett to join their group. As Jay is listening to this, he dejectedly says, “I hate Brett!Pete, in the background, tells Sasappis and Alberta, “Wow – hard to imagine feeling this betrayed by friends.Sasappis then asks him, “Didn’t your best friend sleep with your wife?”, to which Pete sarcastically responds, “Yes Sasappis, thanks for that helpful example.

Outside, Samantha and Mark (the contractor) are in front of a garden shed. Mark asks Samantha if she wants him to take down the whole shed, to which she answers yes – she thinks it’s an eyesore. When Mark grabs the front door and takes it down, three ghosts dressed in military uniforms march out, with one exclaiming, “What is the meaning of this?” As Mark is telling Samantha that the rest of the shed will be easy to take down, she is looking at the three ghosts in shock. One of the ghosts, Nigel (the British soldier from 1777), states, “These barracks are the sovereign territory of his Royal Highness, King George, the III!” He then notices Samantha looking at him and says to his fellow soldiers, “And look at this one – gawking.Samantha, forgetting that Mark was there, responds, “Sorry.” As the ghosts gasp in surprise, Samantha realizing her mistake, looks at Mark and tells Mark that she is sorry – she forgot she had a meeting, and he should leave the shed up for now. As Samantha hurriedly walks away, the three British soldiers look at each other in astonishment that she can see them.

Samantha runs into the house where Alberta, Pete, Sasappis, and Trevor are and asks them about the British soldiers who are living in the shed. Alberta tells Samantha not to worry about them; they mostly stick to themselves. Pete agrees, saying that the soldiers come to the house once every year or so with a dispute because they never got over losing the war. As Trevor jumps in with a comment and Sasappis sarcastically responds, Pete goes on to say that the Americans get the house and the British get the shed. As Samantha is listening to this, Jay walks in, shaking his head, saying, “No, no, no, no!” Concerned, Samantha asks Jay what is wrong, and he tells her that Hitch died. Samantha walks to Jay to tell him how sorry she is to hear that news. As she is trying to comfort him, Jay asks Samantha if she knew who Hitch was and she tells him no. Jay then tells her that Hitch was his Dungeons and Dragons character. Relieved that Hitch was not a real person, Samantha tells Jay that she is not trying to be insensitive, but she does not understand what the big deal is. Pete walks to Samantha and tells her that as a long-time adventurer, he understands the bond between Jay and his character. Pete then goes on to say that he shed a few tears when he lost character on Dungeons and Dragons to a Demogorgon. As Samantha is relaying this information to Jay, he lifts his head up in surprise and asks Samantha if Pete played Dungeons and Dragons. Pete tells Samantha that he did and that it was very popular in the 80’s and suggests that he and Jay could play together. When Samantha tells Jay this, he gets excited and tells Samantha that they can play if she just tells him what Pete says during game time. When Samantha hesitates, Jay reminds her that he has no friends to play with and she reluctantly agrees. Jay and Pete are excited and start dancing.

Nigel and the other British soldiers demand to talk with someone in the house. As Alberta, Samantha, Trevor, Pete, and Sasappis walk in, Samantha asks what’s going on and Nigel exclaims, “Aha!” “She can see us!”. After introducing herself and asking how she could help him, Nigel asks for the door to the shed be put back. While discussing this, they are interrupted by Jay, asking Samantha if she where his Decepticons shirt is. Samantha tells Jay that it may be in the dryer, and she will help him look when she finishes talking with the British soldiers. Samantha then tells Nigel that the door will be put back. After this, one of the British soldiers asks Nigel if they can go and he is hesitant to leave, saying, “I suppose there’s no reason to linger.” and “No other reason I can think of.”. As they are turning to leave, Isaac comes downstairs telling Samantha that Jay’s shirt may be in the hall closet. He sees Nigel and comes to a stop on the stairs and they both look at each other in surprise. They greet each other. As Isaac walks downstairs, (almost missing a step), he asks Nigel, “What um…fortune prompts such an unexpected visit?Nigel tells him that it is a trivial matter that is now concluded. As they are talking to each other, Samantha asks if she’s crazy or if there is chemistry between Isaac and Nigel. Sasappis and Pete tells Samantha that there is chemistry between them, and it has been going on for centuries, but neither one of them will make the first move. By this time, Isaac and Nigel are concluding their conversation and Nigel and his soldiers leave. Isaac sighs and turns to go back upstairs saying, “Well, back to the closet.” Surprised and thinking that he means something else, Samantha looks at Isaac and asks him, “What?”. He looks at her and responds, “To look for Jay’s shirt.

Later, as Jay, Pete, Sasappis and Alberta are happily playing Dungeons and Dragons, Samantha (looking bored) is translating for everyone. She starts daydreaming as the ghosts are quizzically looking at her wondering why she is not translating. Samantha asks if the game is over and Jay tells her that this specific session is over, but Dungeons and Dragons is a game that can last for months or even years. Pete tells a joke as Samantha looks on in dismay.

The next morning, Samantha is in the kitchen and Isaac walks in and looks out the window. Sighing deeply, he asks “How about those Brits stopping by?” “Probably won’t have to worry about them stopping by for a few years.Samantha looks at him and tells Isaac she thinks Nigel seems like a good guy. Isaac agrees and says that while he does not agree with his politics, he does consider Nigel is a man of honor. Thinking about what Isaac’s statement, Samantha tells him that he is also a man of honor. Hearing this, Isaac lowers his voice and tells Samantha that there is a secret that he has been keeping from Nigel and although he would feel better sharing the secret, he thinks that Nigel may not take it well once he tells him what it is. Samantha then tells Isaac that something that may have seemed so unthinkable in the past may not be a big deal now. Thinking about what she has said, Isaac makes the decision to tell Nigel his secret, which makes Samantha excited and proud.

Later, Jay yawns and tells Samantha that although they were up late last night playing Dungeons and Dragons, he had a good time. Samantha lies and tells Jay that she also had a good time and didn’t notice that they were up all night. Pete, not knowing that Samantha is not being truthful, agrees with her and said that he had a fun time too. Jay then tells Samantha that the best part of the night was getting to know the ghosts better, especially Pete. After Jay tells Samantha that they will need to start playing a few times a week, Samantha lies and tells Jay that the ghosts don’t want to play with him anymore. As Jay and Pete look at Samantha in surprise, she tells Jay that because the ghosts were not able to physically move the pieces, they got bored and no longer wanted to play. Looking disappointed, Jay tells Samantha that he will just put the game away. As Jay walks out, Pete looks at Samantha and accuses her of being worse than any of the monsters that he encountered in Dungeons and Dragons and walks out of the room.

In another room, Pete is walking back and forth telling Alberta and Sasappis what Samantha said to Jay about Dungeons and Dragons. Alberta asks in disbelief, “So she just straight-up lied to him?” and Pete throws his hand up and responds, “Just like it was nothing!” and continues pacing. Sasappis tells both of them last night was a lot of fun and this situation needs to be fixed. As they wonder how they can talk to Jay to let him know that Samantha lied, Jay walks in the room, and Sasappis comes up with an idea.

Nigel and Isaac are sitting on the couch nervously looking at each other. Nigel suggests that they discuss what Isaac wants to talk about. Isaac tells Nigel that he’s been keeping a personal secret from him for the past 250 years and he’s nervous about he’s going to take it. Nigel looks at him and assures him that he thinks he would take the secret just fine. Surprised, Isaac takes a breath and tells him, “Nigel…I killed you.” Stunned, Nigel frowns and shouts, “Excuse me?” {There is a flashback that shows Isaac watching Nigel through the spyglass on his musket when he sneezes and accidentally shoots and kills him}. Still in shock, Nigel asks Isaac if he was the cowardly sniper that took his life and stuttering, Isaac tells him that it was not his intention to kill him. Interrupting him, Nigel accuses Isaac of murdering a fellow officer in cold blood. Isaac insists that he wanted to apologize, but still angry, Nigel walks out.

As Jay is taking a shower, Alberta looks out in the hall to make sure Samantha is not coming in. She then tells Trevor it’s ok for him to use the steam from Jay’s shower to write “She Lied” on the bathroom mirror. As Trevor starts writing, Pete, Alberta, and Sasappis are excitedly looking on. Pete then tells Trevor to write faster as Jay is getting out of the shower. As Jay goes to the mirror and sees the words, “She Lied”, he jumps in surprise and wonders out loud what Samantha lied about. Thinking about the extra writing he will have to do, Trevor says, “Seriously Dude – this is going to kill me.” After Pete tells him that they’ve came too far to stop now, Trevor agrees and starts writing on the mirror again while Jay looks on in surprise.

Jay walks in the bedroom where Samantha is sitting on the bed typing on her laptop. He lies and tells her that the internet is working fine now and since one of his friends had to drop out, and she told him that she enjoyed playing, he signed her up. As Samantha is looking at him in disbelief, Jay then tells her he knows that she lied. Samantha jumps up and asks him how and Jay tells her that one of the ghosts told him by writing on the bathroom mirror. As Samantha mutters “Trevor” under her breath, Jay asks her why she lied. Samantha tells him that she while she wanted to help him play with the ghosts, she does not like his game. Hurt, Jay tells Samantha that he misses his friends and he felt like he was part of the group when he was playing with the ghosts. As Samantha is getting ready to respond, she hears Pete yelling, “The British is coming!” “The British is coming!” She then tells Jay that she hears him as she leaves the room.

As Samantha, Isaac, Trevor, Pete, and Flower are going downstairs, Samantha turns to Isaac and asks him, “I assume things didn’t go so great?Isaac just looks at her and tells her that it did not. As they make it downstairs, Nigel informs everyone that it has come to his attention that he was murdered by Isaac. Hearing this, Samantha turns to Isaac in surprise and asks him, “Wait – that was the secret?Nigel then informs everyone that the British soldiers would be taking the house. Isaac then walks between Trevor and Pete and tells Nigel that his army would defend his house to the bitter end. As Trevor and Pete go to support Isaac, Nigel then tells him, “If it’s war you want, then war you should have”. Isaac and his men (Pete and Trevor) start lightly pushing Nigel and his soldiers as Samantha and the others look on. Upset that they cannot do “real” battle because they are ghosts, Pete comes up with the ideal to play Dungeon and Dragons to simulate actual combat.

Jay and Samantha are sitting at the head of the table, while Isaac, Pete, Sasappis and Alberta are on one side and Nigel and his troops are on the other side. Jay, not completely understanding what is going on, is just happy that he is able to pull Dungeon and Dragons back out. As they begin to play, Isaac and Nigel are upset because this is not real battle. Isaac then tells Nigel that while killing him was an accident, not telling him about it for the last two centuries was wrong and for that, he apologizes. Nigel asks Isaac why he did not say anything before, and Isaac tells him he was afraid that he would angry. Meanwhile, Samantha tells Jay that Isaac and Nigel are making up. Jay asks what Isaac did and Samantha tells him that Isaac accidentally killed Nigel. Jay responds, “Ooh – that is hard to bounce back from.

Nigel asks Isaac how does one accidentally shoots someone. As Isaac tells him it was because he was intending to spy on him using his musket eyeglass that he invented, Nigel interrupts and says, “Oh, like your name, except with an “Eye” in the beginning. Surprised, but happy that Nigel got it, Isaac smile and says, “Yes – how did you know?Nigel shrugs and says, “What else could it be?” “It’s simply brilliant!Nigel then tells Isaac that he loves the ideal and Isaac responds by saying, “I love you”, shakes his head and then adds on, “loving it”. Nigel then considered the matter settled and informed everyone that the invasion was canceled. He thanks Isaac for his hospitality and tells him, “Until the next parley”. As Nigel stands up to leave with his troops, Isaac, sad, looks at Samantha, who encourages him to say something to Nigel. Isaac stands up and suggests that they parley more often. Nigel is interested, so Isaac recommends a walk around the grounds to “discuss peace among other matters”. Nigel tells Isaac that he is free now and they both leave together.

Samantha tells Jay that the conflict is resolved, and Jay begins to put the Dungeon and Dragons game away. Samantha tells him that D & D is not a game that is done in an hour, and she wants to continue playing. After Jay asks her if she really wants to continue playing, Samantha tells him no, but she will for him. Jay looks at her and tells her, “Good – because I joined that book club last year for you.” As Samantha just looks at him, Jay claps his hands and rolls the dice to begin playing with the ghosts.

As Jay is getting out of the shower and walking towards the bathroom mirror, he sees a message that reads “Make Pizza.” Jay looks around and says, “Guys – we’re not doing this!” “This is not the new system.Sasappis tells Trevor that he really wants to smell some pepperoni. Trevor points a finger and tells Sasappis, “There is no way I’m writing peperoni!” In the background, Jay yells, “Seriously – this is super creepy!” As Trevor is looking at him, Jay asks them to leave if they are still there.

Episode Quotes

  • “Troops, we’re running low on fresh water, so I must speak against this ridiculous new trend of hand-washing.” – Isaac
  • “Quite a striking fellow. He’s fit of body, well-groomed, ready for action.” – Isaac
  • “Uh, did you guys know there’s three British soldiers from the Revolutionary War living in our garden shed?” – Sam
  • “They’ve never gotten over losing the war.” – Pete
  • “Well, those limeys can wipe their eyes with crumpets.” – Trevor
  • “She can see us. My God, what foul deal with the devil hath provoked such a power?” – Nigel
  • “Oh, no, I think it’s fair to say that your presence is the furthest thing from unpleasant.” – Isaac
  • “Okay, am I nuts, or is there, like, crazy chemistry between these two?” – Sam
  • “All right, here it goes. Nigel? Yes, Isaac? I killed you.” – Isaac
  • “Are you telling me the cowardly sniper that took my life was you?” – Nigel
  • “I was in the shower, I was nude, and then letters just appeared in the steam!” – Jay
  • “The British are coming! The British are coming!” – Pete
  • “Well… if you insist that the time for words has passed… just coming through… then, no matter the cost in blood or treasure, my army and I will defend this house to the bitter end. If it’s war you want… then war you shall have.” – Isaac
  • “Perhaps, say, we could walk the grounds sometime to discuss the peace… among other matters.” – Isaac