Freeze! Hands up and down on the ground, Flower’s hippie commune yells as they rob a bank. Flower also removes her mask even though she’s supposed to keep her identity a secret including her real name – Susan! Anyway, they get their money from the bummer bank and then run out of there before anyone can catch and arrest them. “Bye!”

In walks Jay with the generously bought favorite coffee order, an americano, for Sam with an adult caffeinated beverage (frappuccino) for himself to match. Sam, sitting around Alberta, Isaac, and Trevor, is busy working on article ideas for a local newspaper, The Ulster Country Review. Alberta offers an idea about a local celebrity… who, you ask? Alberta Haynes herself, of course! She’s a good story, she boasts, just as Flower walks in through the wall asking if she’s told them about the time she robbed a bank. Isaac clarifies yes, she has. Once a week for the last fifty years in fact. Flower’s story of her commune robbing a bank and giving the money to poor people catches Sam’s attention. But although Sam takes interest in the story and wants to pitch it, Flower opposes that idea and refuses to allow her to write about it. Flower took an eternal blood oath after all. She gets upset and storms off anyway.

Now, welcome to Sam’s new office! Well, at least for her first pitch meeting – and meets two new ghosts as well! Winky, a 12-year-old who got trampled by a horse, and Shiki, a Lenape ghost who’s been there since the 1500s. Their exchange is interrupted by the Editor Sam’s about to meet with, but he decides to just check the ideas out in his office beforehand. Unfortunately, he isn’t impressed (other than briefly about Sam’s note to grab some gummy bears for Jay), so, desperate times call for desperate measures. Sam attempts to pitch Flower’s hippie bank robbery story, which catches his interest. “Give me 6,000 words by Tuesday.” SOLD!

Sam reluctantly tells Jay, as well as Alberta and Isaac, that the Editor bought Flower’s story, which is bad because Flower is her only source and doesn’t want her writing about it. Isaac and Alberta are puzzled about Flower’s hesitation about re-telling the story since she’s bragged about it before. Alberta believes that if Flower is hiding something, that means it must be juicy, and if it’s juicy, she wants to know. Isaac agrees and insists that Sam should write the article. Jay even suggests that the ghosts can interview Flower to get the information needed instead, and Isaac agrees that they can trick her into getting the deets that they’re all looking for. And I… I guess no one will let Jay know how that conversation ended. Poor Jay 🙁

Sam heads upstairs to Thor’s room to find Sasappis. Jay is always a bit surprised when the ghosts happen to be in the same room as him, so he asks for a roll call. Sure. Sasappis, Pete, Trevor. Anyway, Sam asks Sasappis if he knew Shiki since they died around the same time. Funny enough, he did (Lenape geography works!). And they were in love (aw). Well, he was in love with her, but it seems as though she didn’t return his affections and “ghosted” him (despite the negative pun). Sam insists that since it’s been about 500 years, Shiki could be in a totally different mindset and Sasappis could have another shot with her. But just as Sasappis starts declaring his love message, Jay comes over to skim Sam’s transcript and stops her. He claims how since this is basically texting, no one is better than texting than “her hubs” and insists to help out. Sam dismisses him by telling Sasappis how “women value honesty and romance, not games”, but Jay laughs and says how that’s cute because, in reality, it would’ve scared Sam off if Jay texted her as often as he actually wanted to from the start. Pete also offers some dating advice: “The Friendzone”. He admits how 9/10 you end up desexualized, like a puppy or brother, but you end up with a friend so “win-win, right?” Haha, no. Sasappis decides to take Jay’s help and he starts the message with a simple “‘Sup.” Trevor is impressed and is “ready to be Miyagi’d,” too.

Back to Sam’s article, here we are with Isaac and Alberta approaching Flower to subtly try and get her to open up about her secret regarding the bank robbery. Isaac says how he was curious why Flower didn’t want Sam to write the story “considering how freely [she] blesses [them] with retellings of it”. She admits that, just between them, there’s a part of the story she’s not ready to share. So, Alberta and Isaac push Flower to tell them her deep, dark secret so they can make sure Sam doesn’t find out. Flower actually gets suspicious of her so-called good friends, so she tests them: what’s her last name? After an awkward pause, she gives them the answer that they *totally remembered*: Montero. While Flower tries to continue questioning them… instead she starts to zone out and loses her train of thought. Isaac and Alberta take advantage of the misdirection and decide to back away while awkwardly laughing together.

Sam returns from her short visit to the office to tell Sasappis, Jay, Trevor, and Pete about Shiki’s message. The editor was confused about why Sam was there, so she made something up which probably could’ve been in an email, “or a non-share, really.” Anyway, Sam read the message she wasn’t a fan of to Shiki: “Sup. Cool you’re still around, Shiki. Would love to hear the haps sometime. Maybe.” Which Shiki was confused at, obviously. She responded with a “Hey” though which is apparently a good sign and shows that she’s interested in playing the game, too. Jay reassures him that all they have to do is craft the perfect reply AND they have a week to work on it! Trevor quips about how he feels out of his element, while Pete reflects on *theoretically* if he were dating he’d “be friendzoning everybody, hard.”

Alberta and Isaac visit Sam in her office to let her know that Flower has a deep dark secret. What is it, you may ask? Well…they don’t know. “Is that enough to go off of?” Not quite. Flower finds them in the office and slowly puts the pieces together in real-time, but Sam confesses anyway that she pitched Flower’s story to the editor. Flower expresses her disappointment which is met by confusion from the others, so she confesses that she’s not proud of what she did. The money was never actually donated to a good cause because before the commune could give it away, she stole it. (GASP!) Well, only Isaac gasped. I guess the others are “simply not a gasper”.

Flower explains that the commune was debating about what to do with the money as we cut away to a flashback. Ted advocates to donate the money to feral cats who live in Costa Rica. He points out how they live in awful conditions: sleep in the dirt, have no escape from the weather, and eat out of the garbage. Correspondingly, Flower also glances around their poor living conditions and suggests that they use the money to help people in need “Like, specifically, us”. However, no one budges from their vote and they continue to argue. Cut back to the present day, Flower says how Ira and she took the money and bolted, but since she got attacked by a bear and ultimately met her end, she’s felt like a fraud her entire afterlife. She wanted to help others but ended up just trying to help herself and met her doom. Then exits the room 🙁

When Sam is back at work the next day, Shiki asks her if she has a reply from Sasappis. Unfortunately no but… wait a minute. Sam is done with these games. She spills the truth to Shiki about how Sasappis loves her and Sam can’t think of a better person who Shiki could spend eternity with. This… is a little intense. Shiki is taken aback and excuses herself to the copy room just as the editor meets Sam in the office. Sam confesses that she appreciates the opportunity to write for them, but she can’t write the article because it would hurt a friend. The editor insists that this information, again, could’ve just been an email.

Alberta and Isaac head upstairs in an attempt to comfort Flower by admitting that they’ve lied about their past as well. Alberta has never actually met Cab Calloway, and Isaac was never at the Boston Tea Party. They remark that none of them lived up to who they wanted to be, but that doesn’t make Flower a fraud. Flower is still a do-gooder and sets the bar, and they wanted to make sure she knew that. She’s comforted just as Sam tells her that she’s not going to write the article. Flower understands and forgives her. She also opens up about how she and Ira were planning to start a business, a fair trade coffee shop, with the money they stole. But Ira told her, “Daisy, we don’t know the first thing about starting a business.” The name “Daisy” catches Sam’s attention as they head downstairs to show Flower the cover of the coffee cup Jay got for her earlier. Flower reads the cup and learns that Ira opened “Daisy’s Coffee Shop” in honor of her and that “profits go toward underprivileged communities and bear safety education.” Flower is touched that Ira made her “dream come true”, and gives permission for Sam to write the article since she realizes that something truly groovy came out of it. Well said, Flower.

Later, Sam comes home to Jay, Flower, Pete, Alberta, Trevor, Isaac, and Sasappis, and exclaims how Lewis (assumingly the editor) loved the bank robbery article! She was even asked to come back to the office next week and pitch more ideas. Pete compliments Alberta for being very helpful with Sam’s article, and Alberta thanks him for being a good friend, which is met with a subtle and awkward chuckle from Pete. He also whispers to Sam “Hello, friendzone. I’m in.” Anyway, Jay gives Sam the next message for Shiki that he helped workshop, but Sasappis expresses his annoyance. He’s not a games guy. He wants commitment… which is exactly what Sam expressed to Shiki the other day, too! How did Shiki respond? She… didn’t really like it. Sasappis gets desperate and attempts to beg Jay for his help to fix this situation, but Sam lies that Sasappis is grateful for Sam’s “help” and he leaves in frustration.

Later that night, Sam says that she doesn’t like that Jay is good at playing games, so he decides to show her a screenshot of an unsent message he wanted to share after their very first date. He wanted them to have cutesy and cheesy pet names for each other, but more noteworthy, he spills his feelings because he likes her. He really, really likes her. And thinks she might be the one. Sam admits it’s charming now…but, yeah, if she saw this originally she wouldn’t have agreed to a second date. So, she begrudgingly agrees to continue helping Sass “text” Shiki. She can’t believe this is what she’s using her ghost powers for, but if that means that Shiki and Sass can do…whatever it is that ghosts do… Jay finally asks the question: Can ghosts have sex? Sass says how they can, but can’t finish. But before Sam can translate any more questions about ghost sex, she excuses herself. Night Night.

• “This mask is so hot. Ah, it’s like my hair was sweating.” – Flower
• “This is not a man who’s destined to keep it tight, Sam.” – Trevor
• “A Robin Hood hippie bank robbery? That’s amazing. This should be the article I write.” – Sam
• “It’s kind of a long story. I had this near-death experience, and now I see ghosts. I guess that’s not such a long story.” – Sam
• “That girl is hiding something, and if she’s hiding something, it’s probably juicy, and if it’s juicy, I’m gonna need to know it.” – Alberta
• “His mind is as sharp as his jawline.” – Isaac
• “Uh, seriously? Can I get a roll call, please? Sure. Sasappis, Pete, Trevor. That’s never not gonna be weird.” – Jay
• “Well, I was in love with her, and I thought she was in love with me, so I killed a deer, and brought it to her family.” – Sasappis
• “Is the point that ghosts have no manners? Walk me through this.” – Pete
• “I like to get myself in something I call “the friendzone.” Now, nine out of ten times you end up completely desexualized, but, at the end of the day, you got a new friend, so win-win, right?” – Pete
• “Okay, just had a pretty intense acid flashback, but I remember before that, you guys were asking me a bunch of questions about the robbery. Why were you doing that?” – Flower
• “Nobody move. She has one plus one, but I’m not confident she realizes it makes two.” – Alberta
• “Really? No one else gasped? Well, I guess if you’re not gasping at that, you’re simply not a gasper.” – Isaac
• “Yeah, that was Ira’s nickname for me ’cause I was his special flower. Also, ’cause it’s a weed and I love weed.” – Flower
• “I’m looking for a woman who wants a dead deer on her doorstep, and when I find her, I’m gonna love her forever.” – Sasappis