Jay and Sam finished repairing the gazebo and it looks beautiful! They turn on the lights to the applause of the Ghosts. Hetty tells Sam, “Now, get some swans in the lake and a couple of giraffes at a dinner party and it will be the gilded age all over again.“ Sam and Jay consider hanging Halloween decorations on the gazebo. Sam turns to the Ghosts saying that they must love Halloween. Alberta tells Sam that they actually hate Halloween. Sam tells Jay they hate it, he thinks that sounds “off brand”. Isaac explains how All Hallows Eve mocks them and belittles their very existence. Pete says, “People putting sheets over their heads and pretending to be ghosts, what is that?” They can’t do any of the fun things the Livings do like dressing in costume or eating candy. Trevor adds that they “can’t hook up with a sexy nurse or sexy kitten or sexy Bobby Boucher from Waterboy.” Sasappis tells Sam that he died on Halloween at a party at the mansion in 1995 and that his Lenape clothing is actually a costume. He tells her, “I’m actually an accountant and my name is Mike.” Sam asks if he’s serious, and he says “No! I’m 500 years old!” Sam laughs and he adds, “I’m a storyteller, it’s a gift.”

Sam understands, but says that all those kids dressed up in costumes are adorable! Hetty explains that every Halloween her beloved Woodstone Mansion is defiled by “adolescent hooligans“. Alberta points out that egg-throwing and toilet-papering the trees has been a persistent practice for generations. Pete adds that it is a long-standing local tradition, passed down from one delinquent father to the next delinquent son. Isaac mentions that it is humiliating and that they are powerless to stop it. Sam informs Jay, and he assures the Ghosts that he will not allow such behavior to occur again. Upon realizing that there are now living people who can intervene, the Ghosts are happy. Isaac wants them to do battle,Thor wants them to, “bash their heads”, but Sam and Jay think that the kids probably did those things because a creepy old lady lived there. They will handle it.

Back at the Mansion, Jay is checking out pre-Halloween pics his friends have posted, there’s a party on a rooftop in Brooklyn. Sam says that Jay has FOMO, fear of missing out. Sam tells him to focus on the positive aspects; it’s their first Halloween as homeowners, they are getting trick-or-treaters, and they will still get to dress up as the Step Brothers. Sam explains to the ghosts that their costumes are cheap, comfortable and doesn’t sexually objectify her. Trevor complains, “but that’s the whole point of Halloween!” The doorbell rings, it’s their first trick-or-treaters. It’s a young boy dressed as a “Ghostbuster”. The Ghosts want to know what “busting ghosts” is! Trevor decides that they should watch the movie “Ghostbuster” tonight, telling them they will love it. Isaac prefers sentries set up to watch for vandals instead. Alberta, Trevor, and Pete opt to watch the movie, while Isaac, Hetty, Sasappis, and Thor decide to keep watch for any potential intruders.

Three kids ride up on bikes, the vandals that the Ghosts warned Sam and Jay about. Hetty blames the parents because “properly raised children would be at home or working in a factory.” They all head outside. The Ghosts, having listened to them last year, fill Sam in on the kids. There’s Zack the leader, his paramour Zoey, and their dumb third-wheel Robbie. Jay -thinking using cool lingo with the kids will make them like him- says “Hey, you got some sick sykes, huh?” Zack, sensing an easy target, says “Thank you, sir.” Sam introduces herself and Jay as the new owners. Jay suggests that whatever happened in the past is water under the bridge, they should all agree it ends there. Zack says that they were planning to egg the place but now that he sees how cool they are, it just doesn’t feel right. Isaac says that it feels like a trap, but Sam and Jay think they are nice. As they begin to walk away, the children start throwing eggs at them.

Sam tells Jay they need to do something but Jay, disappointed that he’s missing out on partying with his friends, just wants to move on. The Ghosts jump in insisting that kids needs consequences. Jay disagrees, but Sam wants to listen to the Ghosts. They were parents, have been around forever, and are like a wise council of elders. Sam decides to call the kids mommies. Jay says “snitches get stitches.” Sam, thinking it will correct their behavior, goes to make the call.

Meanwhile, Alberta, Trevor and Pete are watching “Ghostbusters”. Alberta, looking horrified says, “People rounding up ghosts, keeping them in some contraption. For what? ‘Till when?” Trevor says that he thought Venkman was a hero, but he’s a war criminal. Pete feels sorry for Slimer, who is just trying to live his afterlife eating leftover room service that no one else wants to eat anyway, but they vacuum him up into a tiny box. Trevor says that he didn’t remember the movie being this disturbing but Pete points out that Trevor was a living when he saw the movie. This a whole new perspective. Alberta wants to know why the ghosts are all green and what could have died and made a green ghost?

Sam and Jay are talking with Zack and his mom at the front door. Zack’s mom ask him to apologize. Zack says he’s sorry and won’t do it again. Sam accepts his apology, but, as Zack and his mom are walking away, Zack turns and makes a slashing motion across his neck. They all gasp.

Isaac holds a meeting in the gazebo with his group to determine how to proceed. Sasappis thinks that the gazebo they are sitting in is an obvious target being recently restored and lit up. They all agree. Isaac says that they have to tell Samantha to turn the lights off but Thor says that he can do it. When he attempts to shut off the lights, the gazebo bursts into flames. The Ghosts run out in panic. Isaac having watched Jay work forever on that gazebo, knows Sam and Jay are going to be mad. The Ghosts worry that they will lose their TV.

Sam runs out to the gazebo, asking what happened. Isaac tells her that the kids did it and the Ghosts all agree. Hetty claims that the fiends had torches! Sasappis corrected that to mean matches but, Alberta says that makes no sense. Going from egging, and toilet papering to arson? Sasappis, Isaac, Thor and Hetty stand by it. Sam declares they have to call the police and Jay adds it’s officially the worst Halloween ever. Sam, knowing she’s the one who talked Jay into moving here, gets upset that it’s because of her that he is unhappy. She dragged him away from all the parties and called those kids mommies and now, there’s no gazebo. She says she is sorry to Jay and walks away upset. Pete can’t believe kids could be capable of doing something like this but Trevor reminds him, “Didn’t kids murder you?” Pete says he’s pretty sure that was an accident.

The police arrive and Sam and Jay explain what happened while the Ghosts listen. The officer says they are aware that these kids are bad news but nothing like arson before. Jay asks what’s going to happen to them? He’s told maybe fines or community service and that Zack will definitely get kicked off the basketball team. They have burned down any hope for a bright future. Thor starts to regret blaming the kids but Isaac tells him to hold it together. Alberta doesn’t believe the story and confronts Isaac‘s group, she says something doesn’t smell right. Alberta tries to guilt Thor into telling the truth and Hetty tries to jump in but Alberta cuts her off, knowing she can get the truth from Thor.

Thor confesses that the kids didn’t do it, and that it was a accident. Pete is taken aback and states that they have to go tell Sam. Hetty points out that even if they were not responsible for this particular act, they’ve been terrorizing the neighborhood for years. Isaac and Hetty try to get the other Ghosts to side with them against the kids, but Trevor sides with Pete. He tells them, “We spend our days complaining about how Halloween makes us out to be evil and movies paint us to be the villains. But if we let some kids take the fall for something that we did, then aren’t we exactly what they say we are? And don’t we deserve to be busted?” Trevor starts a slow clap, from the ‘80s movies, and one by one the ghosts join in.

Outside, the officers see charred wood from when Sam and Jay had the Viking funeral. They realize Sam and Jay are the people that previously set fire to their canoe. They ask them what’s really going on. Sam gets defensive, but Isaac leans in to tell Sam that they had lied about the kids starting the fire. Sam concocts a story that she was smoking and didn’t want Jay to know, so she hid in the gazebo and perhaps she didn’t put it completely out. The officers tell them that if they have any other complaints, to lose their number. Sam tells them that is more than fair. Sam tells Jay that the ghosts did it.

The Ghosts try to apologize but Sam won’t hear it, saying this was unacceptable and that they are no wise council of elders. Jay says they are the children in this scenario, and children need consequences. Pete, Trevor and Alberta try to say they weren’t involved but Sam shuts them all down. There will be no TV for one week. The Ghosts complain but Sam and Jay walk away.

Later, Sam joins Jay on the couch as he’s scrolling through his phone. Sam asks how the rooftop parties are going. Jay tells her that their friends have left the rooftop for a warehouse party. Sam tells Jay that she is sincerely sorry that Jay had a lame Halloween but Jay says that he didn’t. “Our gazebo got burned down by ghosts on Halloween, in front of our haunted house. We by far had the coolest Halloween of all our friends.“ Jay tells Sam that when they first moved there from NY he thought their lives were going to be boring, but now knows they will be anything but boring.

Some time later, Jay asks Sam how the Ghosts are taking their punishment. Sam says they aren’t loving it. Standing behind the couch are all the Ghosts complaining about the punishment. Sam says maybe they should just put on something educational, but Jay tells her to stay strong!

• “Woo-hoo! Two days of sanding, three coats of paint, but the smiles you claim to see on your invisible friends’ faces make it all worthwhile.” -Jay
• “People putting sheets over their heads and pretending to be “ghosts” –Pete
• “Can’t hook up with a sexy nurse.” -Trevor
• “They throw eggs, put toilet paper in the trees…” -Alberta
• “Like when Mamie Fish excluded me from her cotillion because she knew I had the more comely ankles.” -Hetty
• “We dress like this every year, because it’s cheap, it’s comfortable, and it doesn’t sexually objectify me.” -Sam
• “We don’t have time for frivolous entertainment. We must set up sentries. An attack is nigh.” -Isaac
• “Then bash them on the heads! Any chance you change your mind on that? No? Okay.” -Thorfinn
• “Our friends are partying on rooftops, and we’re being egged by the cast of Stranger Things.” -Jay
• “I’m definitely not a parent.” I mean, I had sex during my life.” -Sasappis
• “People rounding up ghosts, keeping them in some contraption. For what? Till when?” -Alberta
• “Tell her to do Blood Eagle; tear out ribs and lungs.” -Thorfinn
• “Where will these rapscallions strike next?” -Isaac
• “If anyone has a water power they’re sitting on, now would be a good time to use it.” -Sasappis
• “Oh, this isn’t good. They worked forever on this. I watched Jay sand for hours, getting sweatier and sweatier…” -Isaac
• “Spill it, iceberg. What are you sitting on?” -Alberta
• “Um, our gazebo got burned down by ghosts on Halloween, in front of our haunted house. We by far had the coolest Halloween of all our friends.” -Jay